How to cook a turkey in 20 easy steps

Step 1: Go buy a turkey
Step 2: Take a drink of whiskey, scotch, or JD
Step 3: Put turkey in the oven
Step 4: Take another 2 drinks of whiskey
Step 5: Set the degree at 375 ovens
Step 6: Take 3 more whiskeys of drink
Step 7: Turn oven the on
Step 8: Take 4 whisks of drinky
Step 9: Turk the bastey
Step 10: Whiskey another bottle of get
Step 11: Stick a turkey in the thermometer
Step 12: Glass yourself a pour of whiskey
Step 13: Bake the whiskey for 4 hours
Step 14: Take the oven out of the turkey
Step 15: Take the oven out of the turkey
Step 16: Floor the turkey up off the pick
Step 17: Turk the carvey
Step 18: Get yourself another scottle of botch
Step 19: Tet the sable and pour yourself a glass of turkey
Step 20: Bless the saying, pass and eat out

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Morning Pic Dump

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Birthdays on November 14th

1947 - P. J. O'Rourke
1889 - Jawaharlal Nehru
1840 - Claude Monet
1954 - Condoleezza Rice
1948 - Prince Charles

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Todays pic Dump

 

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Afternoon Funnies

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Bonus Pics

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Today in History

Moby-Dick published, 1851

American Revolution

Benjamin Franklin takes sides, 1776

Automotive

Last day for Texas' celebrated drive-in Pig Stands, 2006

Civil War

Lincoln approves Burnside's plan to capture Richmond, 1862

Cold War

United States gives military and economic aid to communist Yugoslavia, 1951

Crime

Ivan Boesky confesses to illegal stock trading activity, 1986

Disaster

Volcano erupts in Colombia and buries nearby towns, 1985

General Interest

Apollo 12 lifts off, 1969

Walesa released from jail, 1982

Hollywood

Cary Grant stars in Hitchcock’s Suspicion, 1941

Literary

Moby-Dick is published, 1851

Music

American classical composer Aaron Copland is born in Brooklyn, New York, 1900

Old West

Franklin Leslie kills Billy "The Kid" Claiborne, 1882

Presidential

Kennedy publishes article on television and American politics, 1959

Sports

Plane crash devastates Marshall University, 1970

Vietnam War

Major battle erupts in the Ia Drang Valley, 1965

Marine general killed in Vietnam, 1967

Nixon promises Thieu that U.S. will continue to support South Vietnam, 1972

World War I

Ottoman Empire declares a holy war, 1914

World War II

Germans bomb Coventry, 1940

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