Irish Wisdom

"Well, Mrs. O'Connor, so you want a divorce?" the solicitor questioned his client. "Tell me about it. Do you have a grudge?"
"Oh, no," replied Mrs. O'Connor. "Shure now, we have a carport."
The solicitor tried again. "Well, does the man beat you up?"
"No, no," said Mrs. O'Connor, looking puzzled. "Oi'm always first out of bed."  Still hopeful, the solicitor tried once again. "Well, does he go in for 
unnatural connubial practices?"
"Shure now, he plays the flute, but I don't think he knows anything about the connubial."  Now desperate, the solicitor pushed on. "What I'm trying to find out are what grounds you have." 
"Bless ye, sor. We live in a flat -- not even a window box, let alone grounds." 
"Mrs. O'Connor," the solicitor said in considerable exasperation, "you need a  reason that the court can consider. What is the reason for you seeking this divorce?" 
"Ah, well now," said the lady, "Shure it's because the man can't hold an 
intelligent conversation." 

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Morning Pic Dump

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Birthdays on March 14th

1879 - Albert Einstein
1952 - David Byrne
1933 - Michael Caine
1923 - Diane Arbus
1933 - Quincy Jones

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Todays Pic Dump

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Blast from the Past

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Afternoon Funnies

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This day in History

Lead Story

Albert Einstein born, 1879

American Revolution

Alexander Hamilton is named captain of artillery company, 1776

Automotive

Mack Truck founder killed in car crash, 1922

Civil War

Yankees capture New Bern, North Carolina, 1862

Cold War

Gorbachev elected president of the Soviet Union, 1990

Crime

The FBI debuts 10 Most Wanted, 1950

Disaster

Boxing team among casualties in Polish Air crash, 1980

General Interest

Jack Ruby sentenced to death, 1964

Birmingham Six released, 1991

Hollywood

Billy Crystal is born, 1948

Literary

Sylvia Beach, bookstore owner and publisher of Ulysses, is born, 1887

Music

The Recording Industry Association of America awards first Gold Record to Perry Como for "Catch A Falling Star", 1958

Old West

Max Brand publishes his first novel, 1919

Presidential

JFK's body moved to permanent gravesite, 1967

Sports

President Clinton expresses desire to return to golf course, 1997

Vietnam War

Allies launch second wave of Rolling Thunder, 1965

Nixon discusses the possibility of U.S. troop withdrawals, 1969

World War I

German cruiser Dresden sinks, 1915

World War II

Germans recapture Kharkov, 1943

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