Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Where Did The White Man Go Wrong?

Indian Chief 'Two Eagles' was asked by a white government official, 'You have observed the white man for 90 years. You've seen his wars and his technological advances. You've seen his progress, and the damage he has done.'

The Chief nodded in agreement.

The official continued, 'Considering all these events, in your opinion, where did the white man go wrong?'

The Chief stared at the government official for over a minute and then calmly replied. 'When white man find land, Indians running it, no taxes, no debt, plenty buffalo, plenty beaver, clean water.

Women did all the work, Medicine man free. Indian man spend all day hunting and fishing; all night having sex.'

Then the chief leaned back and smiled. 'Only white man dumb enough to think he could improve system like that.' 

****************************************************************

Morning Pic Dump








Ancient Civilization



**********************************************************

Birthdays on October 30th

1735 - John Adams
1871 - Paul Valery
1894 - Jean Rostand
1885 - Ezra Pound
1981 - Ivanka Trump

*********************************************
Todays Pic Dump








Hurricane survival kit


***********************************************

Blast from the Past

large;">**********************************************

Afternoon Funnies











**********************************************

Today in History

Lead Story
Welles scares nation, 1938
American Revolution
Naval committee established by Congress, 1775
Automotive
The World's Columbian Exposition closes in Chicago, 1893
Civil War
Union General Ormsby MacKnight Mitchel dies, 1862
Cold War
Eisenhower approves NSC 162/2, 1953
Crime
Oakland, California, enacts anti-drug law, 1890
Disaster
Perfect storm hits North Atlantic, 1991
General Interest
Queen of American high society dies, 1908
Juan Carlos assumes power in Spain, 1975
Quebec separatists narrowly defeated, 1995
Hollywood
Henry "The Fonz" Winkler is born, 1945
Literary
Sense and Sensibility is published, 1811
Music
Aaron Copland's Appalachian Spring premieres at the Library of Congress, 1944
Old West
The city of Helena, Montana, is founded after miners discover gold, 1864
Presidential
John Adams is born, 1735
Sports
Muhammad Ali wins the Rumble in the Jungle, 1974
Vietnam War
Marines repel attack near Da Nang., 1965
Heavy monsoon rains hit Vietnam, 1970
World War I
Ottoman Empire signs treaty with Allies , 1918
World War II
FDR approves Lend-Lease aid to the USSR, 1941


All posts, jokes, stories, cartoons, photos and videos on this site
are understood to be in the public domain.
If you hold the copyright to any of them and would like me to remove them,
please contact me at papacase77@gmail.com

Monday, October 29, 2012

Euro English


The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in plan that would be known as "Euro-English".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of the"k". This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have 1 fewer letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like "fotograf" 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be ekspekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkorage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.

Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent "e"s in the language is disgraseful, and they should go away.

By the fourth year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".

During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.

After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi to understand ech ozer. Ze drem vil finali kum tru!


*************************************************

Morning Pic Dump









 *********************************************

Birthdays on October 29th

************************************************

Todays Pic Dump











*********************************************** 
 Blast from the Past
  ******************************************


Afternoon Funnies








  ***********************************************

Today in History

John Glenn returns to space, 1998
American Revolution
Hancock resigns as president of Congress, 1777
Automotive
Guitarist Duane Allman dies in motorcycle accident, 1971
Civil War
The Battle of Wauhatchie concludes, 1863
Cold War
Israel invades Egypt; Suez Crisis begins, 1956
Crime
Dominick Dunne, chronicler of high-profile crimes, is born, 1925
Disaster
Killer smog claims elderly victims, 1948
General Interest
Sir Walter Raleigh executed, 1618
Stock market crashes, 1929
Hollywood
Richard Dreyfuss born, 1947
Literary
James Boswell is born, 1740
Music
"96 Tears" becomes a #1 hit for the enigmatic and influential ? and the Mysterians, 1966
Old West
The first store opens in the frontier town of Denver, Colorado, 1858
Presidential
McKinley assassin is executed, 1901
Sports
Sandy Saddler beats Willie Pep for the first time, 1948
Vietnam War
Bobby Seale gagged during his trial, 1969
U.S. troop strength reaches five-year low, 1971
World War I
Jane Addams writes to Woodrow Wilson about dangers of preparing for war, 1915
World War II
The British protest against the persecution of Jews, 1942

All posts, jokes, stories, cartoons, photos and videos on this site
are understood to be in the public domain.
If you hold the copyright to any of them and would like me to remove them,
please contact me at papacase77@gmail.com