Before you meet God

A man died and went to The Judgment. St. Peter met him at the Gates of Heaven and said, "Before you meet with God, I thought I should tell you -- we've looked at your life, and your really didn't do anything particularly good or bad. We're not at all sure what to do with you. Can you tell us anything you did that can help us make a decision?"

The newly arrived soul thought for a moment and replied, "Yeah, once I was driving along and came upon a woman who was being harassed by a group of bikers. So I pulled over, got out my tire iron, and went up to the leader of the bikers. He was a big, muscular, hairy guy with tattoos all over his body and a ring pierced through his nose. Well, I tore the nose ring out of his nose, and told him he and his gang had better stop bothering the woman or they would have to deal with me!"

"I'm impressed," St. Peter responded, "When did this happen?"

"About two minutes ago," came the reply. 

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Morning Pic Dump

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Birthdays on October 19th

 1895 - Lewis Mumford
1944 - Peter Tosh
1937 - Peter Max
1956 - Grover Norquist
1931 - John le Carre

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Todays Pic Dump

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Blast from the Past

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Afternoon Funnies

 

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Todays Quote

Birthday Boy

Ty Pennington

Our show proves that some pretty incredible things can happen when people come together.
Ty Pennington

I know what's it's like to grow up with ADHD and how important it is for parents, caregivers and patients, to have access to accurate information.
Ty Pennington

I was the kid who was drawing on tables or removing the legs of furniture.
Ty Pennington

When I was handed a hammer, my first project was building a three-story tree house.
Ty Pennington

My first job in construction paid my way through art school. I was building to pay my bills.
Ty Pennington

A home is more than just where you live; it reflects who you are.
Ty Pennington

Design can change how you look at yourself.
Ty Pennington

I like women who are self-sufficient.
Ty Pennington

I can cook really well. I started cooking as a kid, so I can fend for myself in the kitchen and even do a little gourmet action.
Ty Pennington