Growing
Old Side Effects
1. Trying to wipe a hair off you lapel just to discover it is attached to your chin.
2. Leaving church, your husband stops to talk, you go on to the car; the gentleman behind the wheel ask, "Are you going home with me today?"
3. You turn your left turn signal on and leave it on all day.
4. Non-life threatening skin growths large enough to name after a pet or relative begin to appear.
5. Your neck tissue takes on a life of it own. So, you are afraid to leave the house during Thanksgiving week.
6. You drive up to a curb side mailbox and order a cheeseburger and fries.
7. You enter the car wash from the wrong way and don't understand why the lady in the other car is yelling at you; you are just as surprised to see her as she is to see you.
8. Putting your Dillard's bill in the collection plate by mistake.
9. Leave the house to discover you have on a mismatched pair of earrings. Return to house and change earrings, leaving the house with the other set of mismatched earrings on.
10. Try to exercise by jogging, but it just makes the wine spill out of your glass all over the place
1. Trying to wipe a hair off you lapel just to discover it is attached to your chin.
2. Leaving church, your husband stops to talk, you go on to the car; the gentleman behind the wheel ask, "Are you going home with me today?"
3. You turn your left turn signal on and leave it on all day.
4. Non-life threatening skin growths large enough to name after a pet or relative begin to appear.
5. Your neck tissue takes on a life of it own. So, you are afraid to leave the house during Thanksgiving week.
6. You drive up to a curb side mailbox and order a cheeseburger and fries.
7. You enter the car wash from the wrong way and don't understand why the lady in the other car is yelling at you; you are just as surprised to see her as she is to see you.
8. Putting your Dillard's bill in the collection plate by mistake.
9. Leave the house to discover you have on a mismatched pair of earrings. Return to house and change earrings, leaving the house with the other set of mismatched earrings on.
10. Try to exercise by jogging, but it just makes the wine spill out of your glass all over the place
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Morning Pic Dump
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Birthdays on September 25th
1897 - William Faulkner
1968 - Will Smith
1932 - Charles Stanley
1969 - Catherine Zeta-Jones
1931 - Barbara Walters
1897 - William Faulkner
1968 - Will Smith
1932 - Charles Stanley
1969 - Catherine Zeta-Jones
1931 - Barbara Walters
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Todays Pic Dump
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Blast from the Past
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Afternoon Funnies
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Todays Quote
Birthday Boy
Shel Silverstein
Shel Silverstein Quotes
I will not play tug o' war. I'd rather play hug o' war. Where everyone hugs instead of tugs, Where everyone giggles and rolls on the rug, Where everyone kisses, and everyone grins, and everyone cuddles, and everyone wins.
Shel Silverstein
Never explain what you do. It speaks for itself. You only muddle it by talking about it.
Shel Silverstein
Tell me I'm clever, Tell me I'm kind, Tell me I'm talented, Tell me I'm cute, Tell me I'm sensitive, Graceful and wise, Tell me I'm perfect - But tell me the truth.
Shel Silverstein
If the track is tough and the hill is rough, THINKING you can just ain't enough!
Shel Silverstein
If you want to find out what a writer or a cartoonist really feels, look at his work. That's enough.
Shel Silverstein
I believe that if you don't want to do anything, then sit there and don't do it, but don't expect people to hand you a corn beef sandwich and wash your socks for you and unzip your fly for you.
Shel Silverstein
I know a way to stay friends forever, There's really nothing to it, I tell you what to do, And you do it.
Shel Silverstein
You'd better get your laugh while you're making your point, or you won't be doing it very long.
Shel Silverstein
To me, freedom entitles you to do something, not to not do something.
Shel Silverstein
I myself do not believe in explaining anything.
Shel Silverstein
He has the obligation to society that any human being has. I don't think a satirist has any greater obligation to society than a bricklayer or anybody else.
Shel Silverstein
Stand-up comics reflect less of a visual humor and more of a commentary.
Shel Silverstein
Imagine - four years you could have spent travelling around Europe meeting people, or going to the Far East of Africa or India, meeting people, exchanging ideas, reading all you wanted to anyway, and instead I wasted it at Roosevelt.
Shel Silverstein
If you're behind the times, they won't notice you. If you're right in tune with them, you're no better than they are, so they won't care much for you. Be just a little ahead of them.
Shel Silverstein
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