Tuesday, December 4, 2012

Kissing Under the Mistletoe at the Airport

Nigel's business trip had gone quite well, but he was ready to return home to the warmth of his family. Bristol airport, on the other hand, had turned a tacky red and green; the loudspeakers blared annoying renditions of once cherished Christmas carols and ancient pop songs. 

Nigel enjoyed Christmas and took it very seriously, and being slightly tired and irritable, he just wanted to get home. He approached the check in desk humming a carol quietly to himself in an attempt to keep his spirits up. 

He began to check in his one suitcase when he saw hanging mistletoe.  Not real mistletoe, but very cheap plastic with red paint on some of the rounder parts and green paint on some of the flatter and more pointed parts, that could be taken for mistletoe only in a very surreal type of way. 

With a considerable degree of irritation and nowhere else to vent it, he said to the girl at the desk, 'Even if we were married, I would not want to kiss you under such a ghastly mockery of mistletoe.'
'Sir,' replied the attendant politely, 'look more closely at where the mistletoe is.' 

'Ok,' muttered Nigel, 'I see that it's above the luggage scale which is the place you'd have to step forward for a kiss.'
'That's not why it's there.'
'Ok, I give up. Why is it there?' snapped Nigel irritably.
The attendant quipped: 'It's there so you can kiss your luggage good-bye.'


Morning Pic Dump


Birthdays on December 4th

Todays Pic Dump

Blast from the Past


Afternoon Funnies


This day in History

Hostage Terry Anderson freed in Lebanon, 1991
American Revolution
Washington's cousin tricks Loyalists, 1780
"Irish Godfather" killed by car bomb in St. Paul, 1928
Civil War
North and South skirmish at Waynesboro, Georgia, 1864
Cold War
Senate approves U.S. participation in United Nations, 1945
Police kill two members of the Black Panther Party, 1969
Amanda Knox convicted of murder in Italy, 2009
Smog kills thousands in England, 1952
General Interest
The mystery of the Mary Celeste, 1872
President Wilson travels to Europe, 1918
Bush orders U.S. troops to Somalia, 1992
Warren Beatty writes, directs, stars in Oscar-winning Reds, 1981
Somerset Maugham sails for Pago Pago, 1916
The "Million Dollar Quartet" convenes at Sun Studios in Memphis, Tennessee, 1956
Old West
Oliver Kelley organizes the Grange, 1867
Washington bids farewell to his officers, 1783
NBA suspends Latrell Sprewell for attacking coach, 1997
Vietnam War
Viet Cong attack Tan Son Nhut airport, 1966
Riverine force surrounds Viet Cong battalion, 1967
World War I
Psychiatrist reports on the phenomenon of shell shock, 1917
World War II
Polish Christians come to the aid of Polish Jews, 1942


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