Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Ducks in Heaven


Three women die in a car accident and go to Heaven. Saint Peter meets them at the Gates and welcomes them saying "you can do as you please in Heaven, just don't step on any ducks."

The women are puzzled but proceed into Heaven. Looking around, they notice there are ducks everywhere. In a matter of minutes, one of the women steps on a duck.

Saint Peter walks up to the woman with a hideously ugly man. Saint Peter shackles the man and the woman together and says, "for stepping on a duck, you have to spend eternity chained to this ugly man."

The other two women are shocked but go about their business until, sure enough, another woman steps on a duck. Immediately Saint Peter comes and shackles her to another ugly man.

The last woman tries desperately to not step on a duck. After a few months of not stepping on any ducks, Saint Peter walks up to the woman accompanied by a stunningly handsome man. He shackles the woman to the man and after a while, the woman being thrilled to be chained to such a handsome man, says "I don't know what I did to deserve this."

The man replies, "I don't know what you did lady, but I stepped on a duck."

**************************************************

Morning Pic Dump














 

************************************************

Birthdays on May 8th

 
1975 - Enrique Iglesias
1964 - Melissa Gilbert
1954 - David Keith
1895 - Fulton J. Sheen
1884 - Harry S. Truman


************************************************

Epic Facts

*************************************************
Blast from the Past


**********************************************
Todays Pic Dump









**********************************************

Todays Quote
Birthday Boy
Harry S. Truman


A bureaucrat is a Democrat who holds some office that a Republican wants.
Harry S. Truman


A leader in the Democratic Party is a boss, in the Republican Party he is a leader.
Harry S. Truman

A pessimist is one who makes difficulties of his opportunities and an optimist is one who makes opportunities of his difficulties.
Harry S. Truman

A politician is a man who understands government. A statesman is a politician who's been dead for 15 years.
Harry S. Truman

A President cannot always be popular.
Harry S. Truman

A president either is constantly on top of events or, if he hesitates, events will soon be on top of him. I never felt that I could let up for a moment.
Harry S. Truman

A President needs political understanding to run the government, but he may be elected without it.
Harry S. Truman

Actions are the seed of fate deeds grow into destiny.
Harry S. Truman

All my life, whenever it comes time to make a decision, I make it and forget about it.
Harry S. Truman

All the president is, is a glorified public relations man who spends his time flattering, kissing, and kicking people to get them to do what they are supposed to do anyway.
Harry S. Truman


Always be sincere, even if you don't mean it.
Harry S. Truman

America was not built on fear. America was built on courage, on imagination and an unbeatable determination to do the job at hand.
Harry S. Truman

Any man who has had the job I've had and didn't have a sense of humor wouldn't still be here.
Harry S. Truman

Art is parasitic on life, just as criticism is parasitic on art.
Harry S. Truman

Being too good is apt to be uninteresting.
Harry S. Truman

Carry the battle to them. Don't let them bring it to you. Put them on the defensive and don't ever apologize for anything.
Harry S. Truman

Experience has shown how deeply the seeds of war are planted by economic rivalry and social injustice.
Harry S. Truman

I do not believe there is a problem in this country or the world today which could not be settled if approached through the teaching of the Sermon on the Mount.
Harry S. Truman

I had faith in Israel before it was established, I have in it now. I believe it has a glorious future before it - not just another sovereign nation, but as an embodiment of the great ideals of our civilization.
Harry S. Truman

I have found the best way to give advice to your children is to find out what they want and then advise them to do it.
Harry S. Truman





All posts, jokes, stories, cartoons, photos and videos on this site
are understood to be in the public domain.
If you hold the copyright to any of them and would like me to remove them,
please contact me at papacase77@gmail.com

No comments:

Post a Comment