UUGGHH!!! Mondays...
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Pun-Liners (Get it???)
• I changed my iPod's name to Titanic. It's syncing now.
• When chemists die, they barium.
• Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
• I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time.
• How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.
• I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.
• This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.
• I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.
• I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.
• They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Type-O.
• PMS jokes aren't funny; period.
• Why were Native Americans here first? They had reservations.
• We are going on a class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there's no pop quiz.
• I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.
• Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who couldn't control her pupils?
• When you get a bladder infection urine trouble.
• Broken pencils are pointless.
• I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.
• What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
• England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.
• I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.
• I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.
• All the toilets in New York's police stations have been stolen. The police have nothing to go on.
• I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.
• Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes.
• Velcro — what a rip off!
• A cartoonist was found dead in his home. Details are sketchy.
• Venison for dinner again? Oh deer!
• The earthquake in Washington obviously was the government's fault.
• Be kind to your dentist. He has fillings, too.
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Morning Pic Dump
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Birthdays on May 14th
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Blast from the Past
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Afternoon randomness
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Todays Quote
Birthday Boy
George Lucas
A lot of people like to do certain things, but they're not that good at it. Keep going through the things that you like to do, until you find something that you actually seem to be extremely good at. It can be anything.
George Lucas
Although I write screenplays, I don't think I'm a very good writer.
George Lucas
Even in high school I was very interested in history - why people do the things they do. As a kid I spent a lot of time trying to relate the past to the present.
George Lucas
Everybody has talent, it's just a matter of moving around until you've discovered what it is.
George Lucas
Film is not an easy occupation. There's a lot of occupations that are difficult and film is one of them.
George Lucas
Good luck has its storms.
George Lucas
He took me from not being able to write a word in terms of writing screenplays to being the king of wooden dialogue.
George Lucas
I thought Star Wars was too wacky for the general public.
George Lucas
If the boy and girl walk off into the sunset hand-in-hand in the last scene, it adds 10 million to the box office.
George Lucas
Learning to make films is very easy. Learning what to make films about is very hard.
George Lucas
Part of the issue of achievement is to be able to set realistic goals, but that's one of the hardest things to do because you don't always know exactly where you're going, and you shouldn't.
George Lucas
'Star Wars' is fun, its exciting, its inspirational, and people respond to that. It's what they want.
George Lucas
The ideals and principles for which Dr King fought have never been forgotten and are as relevant today as they were 40 years ago.
George Lucas
The secret to film is that it's an illusion.
George Lucas
Whatever has happened in my quest for innovation has been part of my quest for immaculate reality.
George Lucas
When you are a beginning film maker you are desperate to survive. The most important thing in the end is survival and being able to get to your next picture.
George Lucas
Working hard is very important. You're not going to get anywhere without working extremely hard.
George Lucas
You simply have to put one foot in front of the other and keep going. Put blinders on and plow right ahead.
George Lucas
George Lucas
The secret to film is that it's an illusion.
George Lucas
Whatever has happened in my quest for innovation has been part of my quest for immaculate reality.
George Lucas
When you are a beginning film maker you are desperate to survive. The most important thing in the end is survival and being able to get to your next picture.
George Lucas
Working hard is very important. You're not going to get anywhere without working extremely hard.
George Lucas
You simply have to put one foot in front of the other and keep going. Put blinders on and plow right ahead.
George Lucas
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If you hold the copyright to any of them and would like me to remove them,
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Haha. I loved all the puns at the top. Some great cartoons as well.
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