Monday, May 14, 2012

UUGGHH!!! Mondays...

UUGGHH!!! Mondays...

How I feel every Friday...


Pun-Liners (Get it???)

• I changed my iPod's name to Titanic. It's syncing now. 

• When chemists die, they barium.

• Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.

• I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time.

• How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.

• I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.

• This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.

• I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.

• I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.

• They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Type-O.

• PMS jokes aren't funny; period.

• Why were Native Americans here first? They had reservations.

• We are going on a class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there's no pop quiz.

• I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.

• Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who couldn't control her pupils?

• When you get a bladder infection urine trouble.

• Broken pencils are pointless.

• I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.

• What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.

• England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.

• I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.

• I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.

• All the toilets in New York's police stations have been stolen. The police have nothing to go on.

• I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.

• Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes.

• Velcro — what a rip off!

• A cartoonist was found dead in his home. Details are sketchy.

• Venison for dinner again? Oh deer!

• The earthquake in Washington obviously was the government's fault.

• Be kind to your dentist. He has fillings, too.


Morning Pic Dump

Birthdays on May 14th
1969 - Cate Blanchett
1961 - Tim Roth
1948 - Robert Zemeckis
1944 - George Lucas
1936 - Bobby Darin
Todays Pic Dump


And yes, I realize there are not actually 20 photos. Give me some credit, Paula

Blast from the Past

Afternoon randomness


Todays Quote
 Birthday Boy 
George Lucas

A lot of people like to do certain things, but they're not that good at it. Keep going through the things that you like to do, until you find something that you actually seem to be extremely good at. It can be anything.
George Lucas

Although I write screenplays, I don't think I'm a very good writer.
George Lucas

Even in high school I was very interested in history - why people do the things they do. As a kid I spent a lot of time trying to relate the past to the present.
George Lucas

Everybody has talent, it's just a matter of moving around until you've discovered what it is.
George Lucas

Film is not an easy occupation. There's a lot of occupations that are difficult and film is one of them.
George Lucas

Good luck has its storms.
George Lucas

He took me from not being able to write a word in terms of writing screenplays to being the king of wooden dialogue.
George Lucas

I thought Star Wars was too wacky for the general public.
George Lucas

If the boy and girl walk off into the sunset hand-in-hand in the last scene, it adds 10 million to the box office.
George Lucas

Learning to make films is very easy. Learning what to make films about is very hard.
George Lucas

Part of the issue of achievement is to be able to set realistic goals, but that's one of the hardest things to do because you don't always know exactly where you're going, and you shouldn't.
George Lucas

'Star Wars' is fun, its exciting, its inspirational, and people respond to that. It's what they want.
George Lucas
The ideals and principles for which Dr King fought have never been forgotten and are as relevant today as they were 40 years ago.
George Lucas

The secret to film is that it's an illusion.
George Lucas

Whatever has happened in my quest for innovation has been part of my quest for immaculate reality.
George Lucas

When you are a beginning film maker you are desperate to survive. The most important thing in the end is survival and being able to get to your next picture.
George Lucas

Working hard is very important. You're not going to get anywhere without working extremely hard.
George Lucas

You simply have to put one foot in front of the other and keep going. Put blinders on and plow right ahead.
George Lucas

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1 comment:

  1. Haha. I loved all the puns at the top. Some great cartoons as well.