Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Answer to College exam depending on your major

College Majors Suppose you have a professor hold up two apples and asks a class “How many objects am I holding?” you would probably get different responses from different majors like…. 

Business: Two Juicy, delious apples that are on sale at my store.

Chemistry: 6×10^30 apple molecules

History: You are holding dinosaur poop

Music: You are holding two objects that if you drop them you will get a D4

Education: Two Apples

Accounting: You are holding one apple because the other one has to go to the government as tax

Psycology: What objects?

Math: You are holding two sets of objects, that take up a finite amount of space called apples.

English: You are holding two lush pieces of fruit, that are nourishing and remind me of my dog Fido. Fido thy sweet fruit. So nourshing in my time of need, you fill me up with……

Art: Two apples (Ha, Ha…Thank goodness for photoshop. The perfect oportunity to take a picture of the professor and alter the picture so that I have a blackmail photo).

Computer Science: Two apples (I’ll take the art major’s picture and post it on my website for all to see, and add links so that people could find similar pictures(and I make $)). 


reaction gifs

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Birthdays on July 31st

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Todays Pic Dump










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Blast from the Past



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Afternoon Funnies














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Todays Quote
  Birthday Girl
J.K. Rowling

Anything's possible if you've got enough nerve.
J. K. Rowling

Death is just life's next big adventure.
J. K. Rowling

Failure means a stripping away of the inessential.
J. K. Rowling

Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself.
J. K. Rowling

Hearing voices no one else can hear isn't a good sign, even in the wizarding world.
J. K. Rowling

His priority did not seem to be to teach them what he knew, but rather to impress upon them that nothing, not even... knowledge, was foolproof.
J. K. Rowling

However my parents - both of whom came from impoverished backgrounds and neither of whom had been to college, took the view that my overactive imagination was an amusing quirk that would never pay a mortgage or secure a pension.
J. K. Rowling

Humans have a knack for choosing precisely the things that are worst for them.
J. K. Rowling

I just write what I wanted to write. I write what amuses me. It's totally for myself. I never in my wildest dreams expected this popularity.
J. K. Rowling

I really don't believe in magic.
J. K. Rowling


I was convinced that the only thing I wanted to do ever - was write novels.
J. K. Rowling

I was set free because my greatest fear had been realized, and I still had a daughter who I adored, and I had an old typewriter and a big idea. And so rock bottom became a solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life.
J. K. Rowling

I will carry on writing, to be sure. But I don't know if I would want to publish again after Harry Potter.
J. K. Rowling

If you want to see the true measure of a man, watch how he treats his inferiors, not his equals.
J. K. Rowling

If you're holding out for universal popularity, I'm afraid you will be in this cabin for a very long time.
J. K. Rowling

Imagination is not only the uniquely human capacity to envision that which is not, and therefore the fount of all invention and innovation. In its arguably most transformative and revelatory capacity, it is the power to that enables us to empathize with humans whose experiences we have never shared.
J. K. Rowling

Indifference and neglect often do much more damage than outright dislike.
J. K. Rowling

It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live.
J. K. Rowling

It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might has well not have lived at all, in which case you have failed by default.
J. K. Rowling

It is our choices... that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
J. K. Rowling

All posts, jokes, stories, cartoons, photos and videos on this site
are understood to be in the public domain.
If you hold the copyright to any of them and would like me to remove them,
please contact me at papacase77@gmail.com



Monday, July 30, 2012

HODGE PODGE

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* I was explaining to my wife last night that when you 
die you get reincarnated but must come back as a different 
creature. She said she would like to come back as a cow. 
I said, "You obviously haven't been listening."

* My wife has been missing a week now. The police said 
to prepare for the worst. So, I had to go down to Goodwill 
to get all of her clothes back.

*  The Red Cross just knocked on my door and asked if 
we could contribute towards the floods in Pakistan . I said 
we'd love to, but our garden hose only reaches the driveway.
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Just wanted to let you know, today I received my
2012 Social Security Stimulus Package.

It contained two tomato seeds,
cornbread mix,
a prayer rug,
2 discount coupons to KFC,
an "Obama Hope & Change" bumper sticker,
and a "Blame it on Bush"poster for the front yard.
The directions were in Spanish.

Watch for yours, coming soon.
 Daily Afternoon Randomness in HQ (40 HQ Photos)

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Original Chinese Proverb:
Give a man a fish, and you feed him for a day. Teach
a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.
New Proverb:
Give a man a welfare check, a cell phone, cash for his
clunker, food stamps, section 8 housing, Medicaid, 100 weeks of
unemployment checks, a 40-ounce malt liquor, needles, drugs,
contraceptives, and designer Air Jordan shoes and
he will vote Democrat for a lifetime
 




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Morning Pic Dump






 




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Birthdays on July 30th

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Todays Pic Dump










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Blast from the Past




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Afternoon Funnies










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Todays Quote
Birthday Girl
HilarySwank

 
Few people know this about me, but I love baking pies.
Hilary Swank

Growing up in a lower-income family, you don't have the resources to make ends meet and you have to find creative ways to get by.
Hilary Swank

I can remember crying on the set of Beverly Hills 90210 after being released from the show a few years ago.
Hilary Swank

I don't know what I did in this life to deserve all of this. I'm just a girl from a trailer park who had a dream.
Hilary Swank

I don't think people should have boundaries put on them, by themselves or society or another gender, because it's our birthright to experience life in whatever way we feel best suits us.
Hilary Swank

I grew up in a trailer park in Bellingham, Washington.
Hilary Swank

I had teachers who I could tell didn't want to be there. And I just couldn't get inspired by someone who didn't want to be there.
Hilary Swank

I had to fight my whole life to break out of my circumstances. That's just part of my makeup.
Hilary Swank

I had to fight my whole life to break out.
Hilary Swank

I haven't tucked a sock in my pants for three years.
Hilary Swank

I like to play women who blaze trails.
Hilary Swank

I love to travel. I'm a curious person.
Hilary Swank

I really chase the things that I want.
Hilary Swank

I think about how I'm spending my money, and I like to spend on my family.
Hilary Swank

I think that we're all continually searching for who we are, and that's ever-evolving and changing.
Hilary Swank

I took 'P.S. I Love You' thinking it was going to be a little funny, and I ended up crying every day on that film.
Hilary Swank

I'm certainly not very book smart, but I started traveling at 16, and it has enriched me in ways I could never begin to explain.
Hilary Swank

It's a quality of my life that I wouldn't change for the world, having grown up with such a humble background.
Hilary Swank

It's how you look at beauty. Is it only an outward appearance with hair and makeup and a hot body, or is it something deeper than that?
Hilary Swank

Learning how to fly, for me, was so euphoric.
Hilary Swank
All posts, jokes, stories, cartoons, photos and videos on this site
are understood to be in the public domain.
If you hold the copyright to any of them and would like me to remove them,
please contact me at papacase77@gmail.com