To: All Employees
Subject: Office conduct during the Christmas season
Effective immediately, employees should keep in mind the following guidelines in compliance with FROLIC (the Federal Revelry Office and Leisure Industry Council).
1. Running aluminum foil through the paper shredder to make tinsel is discouraged.
2. Playing Jingle Bells on the push-button phone is forbidden (it runs up an incredible long distance bill)
3. Work requests are not to be filed under "Bah humbug."
4. Company cars are not to be used to go over the river and through the woods to Grandma's house.
5. All fruitcake is to be eaten BEFORE July 25.
6. Egg nog will NOT be dispensed in vending machines.
In spite of all this, the staff is encouraged to have a Happy Holiday.
Today in History
- Folies Bergere stage first revue, 1886
- American Revolution
- Howe brothers offer amnesty, 1776
- Unsafe at Any Speed hits bookstores, 1965
- Civil War
- Rebels are defeated at the Battle of Franklin, 1864
- Cold War
- The United States and U.S.S.R. open talks to reduce intermediate-range nuclear forces, 1981
- "America's First Female Serial Killer" strikes, 1989
- Achille Lauro sinks near Somalia, 1994
- General Interest
- Winston Churchill born, 1874
- Meteorite strikes Alabama woman, 1954
- Brady Bill signed into law, 1993
- Jeopardy! contestant's record winning streak ends, 2004
- Mark Twain is born, 1835
- Elton John's Greatest Hits hits #1, 1974
- Old West
- Harvey "Kid Curry" Logan sentenced, 1902
- Truman refuses to rule out atomic weapons, 1950
- Football coach Bill Walsh is born, 1931
- Vietnam War
- McNamara warns Johnson that communists are gaining strength in South Vietnam, 1965
- South Vietnamese draft articles for new constitution, 1966
- McCarthy to enter Democratic presidential primary, 1967
- White House announces no full withdrawal until final truce agreement signed, 1972
- World War I
- German foreign minister celebrates revolution in Russia, 1917
- World War II
- USSR attacks Finland, 1939
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